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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23072521">My version of 'Ben Solo' by: boolucole</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lila_Katelyn_Weasley1222/pseuds/Lila_Katelyn_Weasley1222'>Lila_Katelyn_Weasley1222</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Star Wars [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Re-vamped version</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 09:26:52</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,710</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23072521</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lila_Katelyn_Weasley1222/pseuds/Lila_Katelyn_Weasley1222</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Star Wars [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1658170</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>My version of 'Ben Solo' by: boolucole</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">


        <li>
            Inspired by

            <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/10398357">Ben Solo</a> by <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/boolucole/pseuds/boolucole">boolucole</a>.
        </li>

    </ul></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>It had taken them months.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Months of careful planning, months of flawless practice, months of acquiring the right gear, months of grieving and getting over the losses he had inflicted.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The General herself had needed to take aside almost everyone in the squad assembled for the task, quietly and one on one, to impress upon them that no matter how they felt about him, she wanted her son alive.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And now? Here he was.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sitting in front of them - well, behind a forcefield reinforced with actual bars, but the same thing – with manacles made of polarity-reversed Kyber crystals that Luke assured them would block all but the most rudimentary of Force sensing powers…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sitting in front of them was Kylo Ren.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Or, well, that’s what he wanted them to call him. General Organa wouldn’t allow it, and instead of seeing that horrid name she associated with everything that had gone so wrong, she personally wrote in his actual name on every form, every placard, every instance where it was needed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sitting in front of them was Ben Solo, the lost older brother to Lila Solo.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He glared up at them from his place on the bench. He had tried to stand and stare at them defiantly, but his mother’s calm and unaffected presence wore him down eventually. He had sat down, and even though he kept in the sigh of relief, the slumping of his shoulders told everyone who cared to look that he was grateful to be off his feet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know what you hope to accomplish,” Ben told them stoically, trying for icing and disdainful but not quite hitting the mark, “I’m not going to change back into your precious little son.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m not trying to get that far. Not today,” General Organa said simply, “Right now, I’m trying to figure out where you started turning into who you are today.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ben blinked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I keep telling her that it wasn’t anyone thing she did, but rather a lifetime of things,” Luke commented from slightly behind and to the side of his sister, “But as always, she refuses to listen to reason.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“More like your reasons,” Leia responded automatically, “Who was it that thought that disappearing for twelve years to an uncharted planet was a good idea?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The same person who found the First Jedi Temple,” Luke shot back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Although they couldn’t be more different, Lila, Ben and Rey were struck with the exact same thought: What children.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They all glanced at each other, Ben from the bench in his cell Lila from behind her mother and Rey from her place standing beside her teacher. It seemed the Kyber manacles weren’t working as well as Luke said they would.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can we get back on track?” Poe finally cut in, and at his side, Finn nodded resolutely. His eyes hadn’t left Ben since he came into sight of the wannabe Sith, and to tell the truth, it was starting to unnerve said Sith. They were both leaning against the wall opposite the cell, but Finn had made sure he had an unobstructed view of the man.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sure,” Leia agreed easily, “Right now, I’m thinking it was when you were four and Luke told you stories of your grandfather.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Immediately, all six of the others groaned – Luke, Lila, Rey, Poe, Finn, and Ben alike – and immediately, they all implicitly understood that the Force connected them all.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But anyway.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It wasn’t the stories of daddy dearest,” Luke said mockingly, ignoring the choking noise Poe made in the background, “It was the fact that he identified with them too much.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Leia waved a hand negligently. “The same thing,” she claimed, but then Finn cleared his throat.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Um, actually, I’m pretty sure that he would’ve come across the concepts himself at some point,” he offered hesitantly, and then when Leia looked about ready to argue, he added, “After all, the First Order doesn’t teach compassion for fallen soldiers.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A flash of a Storm Trooper uniform, slick with blood, flashed through their minds.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Leia’s mouth closed with a click.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ben stayed silent.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright, so maybe not then,” she conceded, and Luke rolled his eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It wasn’t any ‘then’!” he insisted, “It was a lifetime of ‘then’s piling up on top of each other!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re a lifetime of thens piling on top of each other,” Leia countered, and Luke made an affronted noise.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That doesn’t even make any sense!” he exclaimed, but Leia smirked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And yet you’re insulted,” she told him smugly, and Luke pressed his lips together as he realized she was right.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Stop fighting,” Lila said, even at age 15, no one heard her, no one except Rey, and somehow Ben, heard her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Isn’t everyone a lifetime of thens piling on top of each other, though?” Rey asked with a raised eyebrow, “That’s what people are. A mass of experiences and personality. Each grain insignificant on its own, but together they make a desert of life.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The five of them stared at her, even Ben, and then Luke and Lila grinned widely.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I see you’ve begun sounding like a wise old Jedi,” he said, inordinately proud of himself, but Rey only scoffed.

Lila cut in;  “No thanks to you, Mr. ‘I- am- one- with- the- Force- and- the- Force- says- to- kick- my- Uncle’s- ass’!” she told him sardonically, and Poe barked out a laugh even as Finn grinned and Leia looked amused.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“LA?! When did you start cursing?!” Ben asked amused.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“When you left me to die in the Jedi Temple. I cursed you every day since.” Lila said with a stone expression.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I had to get lessons from literal dead people!” Rey counteracted.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Same!” Lila agreed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke and Leia blinked. Poe and Finn looked flabbergasted. Ben seemed intrigued, for he leaned forward a little.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dead people?” he asked, then clarified, “Do you mean Force ghosts?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rey hesitated, then explained, “No, not Force ghosts-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“These ones come to me in my dreams, so they’re solid.” Lila finished.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Leia looked at Rey. “Are you sure that you’re not my child?!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hope not,” Ben thought. “Then I would get charged with Sibling Incest.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Which would give them a much greater avenue of teaching, being able to shape the mental world around them,” Luke divined approvingly, “Very good. Who is it that visits you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mace Windu, Obi-Wan Kenobi-” Lila said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Some small gremlin named Yoda,” Rey listed, deftly ignoring Luke’s snickering, “And some guy named Anakin.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Anakin and Padmé had explained to Rey who they were to the padawan, of course, but she enjoyed playing the fool just to see the looks on everyone’s faces. Luke and Leia immediately seemed to suffer twin heart attacks, clutching their chests and taking an instinctive step back. Rey and Lila played the confused innocents with Finn and Poe, but Ben only became more excited.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Anakin?!” he almost shouted, “You’ve been taught by Anakin?! Anakin Skywalker?! Grandfather?! What’s he like, did me mention me?!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I never talked to him,” Lila started. “But, Obi-Wan said that he was very disappointed in you. Sorry, Benny.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Benny. Thoughts came flooding back to Ben that wanted to make him cry.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rey adopted a look of surprise, and seemed to consider her words before she answered, “Yes, actually, he did mention you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’d he say?!” Ben demanded, seeming almost hysterical, but Rey put a dusting of red on her cheeks and looked away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well,” she began delicately, “In between all the death threats, rages, and being calmed down by a nice lady called Padmé…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Grandpa was short-tempered then, eh?” Lila asked. Again no one heard her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luke and Leia blinked harshly but waited for her to finish.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rey took a deep breath, and then rushed out, “Hebasicallysaidyou’reashittalkingcockwafflewhoshouldbeburnedtodeathonMustafar.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ben blinked stupidly. “What?” he managed to choke out, and Rey huffed out an annoyed like noise.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lila let out a laugh. “Really Rey?! Haha, can I tell him what it was meant to sound like?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sure, L,” Rey said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He said you’re a shit-talking cockwaffle who should be burned to death on Mustafar,” Lila said a little more slowly, and Poe had to bite down on his fist very hard to avoid bursting out laughing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ben stared at her, nonplussed, and then slowly sat back to slump against the wall.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Padmé pulled me aside to explain a little more. He hates you because he sees himself in you, back when he was also a cockwaffle, and also because you’re working to redo everything he tried to undo at the end of his life,” Rey added helpfully, then paused and tacked on, “Also, seeing a regal princess-like Padmé Amidala saying cockwaffle is really jarring.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then, she was elbowed in the side by Poe and directed her gaze to a sad and pensive Luke.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I remember that,” he recalled, sad and fond all at once, “The last moments of his life, I mean. He threw Emperor Palpatine into a ship’s power core for me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright, but that still doesn’t answer my original question!” Leia burst out with unexpectedly, “Where did we go wrong with him?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lila flinched at her mother’s outburst.</span>
</p><p><span>Poe immediately started chuckling and pushed himself forward. “Don’t you see?” he asked rhetorically, stepping forward until he was right before the force field and staring into Ben’s upturned eyes, “We already told you it wasn’t one</span> <span>moment, but a lot. Ever since he was a child, he’s needed someone to look up to, someone to be a role model for him.”</span></p><p>
  <span>Turning around to address the others, he said, “Han could never be that for him, for whatever reason, so he had to pin everything on someone, not present, someone he could project onto. He shaped Darth Vader, Anakin, into the person he wanted him to be, the person he could look up to.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So, what you’re saying is…” Rey began, and Poe nodded.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The problem wasn’t what you did, Leia. It’s what you didn’t do,” Poe told her affectionately, “Ever since he was born, this poor child has been alone. Been forgotten. Ben Solo.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>……</span>
</p><p>
  <span>………</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can I have my lightsaber back?” Ben asked in a monotone, and almost immediately, Lila burst out with, “Mhm I’m thinking about it!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Poe gave a shit-eating grin and ducked out of the circle of hands reaching out to cuff him.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
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